Beaches

There were a lot of things I was able to do in Chicago that I can’t do here, like, for example, socialize.  Back home, I had close female friends to go barhopping with and I knew really cool bands whose shows I could go to.  None of that happens now.  But what I can do here is go to the beach.

Don’t try to argue that Chicago has beaches.  I used to argue that too.  I know, the whole lakefront is a beach.  I know about the rule of no construction east of Lake Shore Drive.  That shit doesn’t matter, because Chicago beaches are a joke.  Dirty, grimy Lake Michigan cannot compare on any level at all to the Pacific Ocean.  The beaches here are beautiful and pristine and endless.  Chicago beaches just don’t even count.

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